Friday 7th January 2022, 17:50pm

Autobiographical, Uncategorized

So the job search has commenced with a couple of hours worth of studying The British Empire in India with a little bit of The French Empire thrown in for good measure. I am taking a break now, having completed what I set out to do and shall restart things on Monday morning, or that is at least the plan I have in mind. What has happened in the meantime? The new printer has been installed I can manage without the wifi business and it fits nicely on the desk, does not rattle or scream when printing and is way faster than the old thing, which now sits forlornly on the floor whilst I wonder as to its final destination. 1st J has successfully moved to Ithaca, which is her spiritual base, she is happiest there and has a place she is settling into so that’s good, I will continue to pinch the photos she made of the cats, if you read yesterdays article you would have seen the one of Lulu otherwise known as Lulabelle also known as meow meow. Anyway enough of Ithaca and more on something else, actually I hope to do a small article on Ithaca sometime, it is a nice town, and I spent many a happy time there in the last few years and hope to go back in the not too distant future.

One of the best things about not having to go to work is that you get lots of spare time to do the things that suit you, that have been building up over a period and need addressing. I have spent a part of today doing that kind of thing, printing documents, helping a mate sort his stuff out and a whole bunch of other stuff that I will not go into here. Having completed these tasks has lifted a bunch of weight off of my back and I am fully ready to attack (if that is the right expression) the next lot of stuff. I may well start tomorrow with a bunch more school work, print off some more paperwork and do stuff around the home, I wish the place to be half way tidy as I have guests on Sunday and first impressions always count the most, I will also go out and buy some nice food and make a nice meal to share. I will not bother shaving, I am done with that nonsense and she knows me to have a beard in any case plus I do not have a razor or other system of hair removal at my disposal.

Nun

I will be getting my backside into gear soon and get ready to go to training, I have not been for a while due to the Christmas break and it will be nice to have some exercise and get a couple of bruises. Hopefully nobody busts my fingers up this time as it hurts and I want my hands to paint, draw and and write and anything else that hands are used for. I may do some painting later on after I get home, or I may not it, it will depend on entirely how I feel.

Black cats and printers

Autobiographical, Uncategorized

So yesterday marked another transition in the great and often eventful journey that I shall call Peters Employment History, I think I am up to 83 now, give or take a couple, I did make a list a while ago now, but cannot be arsed with anymore. Like many an old film or repeat TV series it has a hole worn in the proverbial and is barely worth carrying on. Living in the past or at least dwelling on it is all good and fine for a little while but does no good if you are looking to and driving forwards in life, it is in fact a bit like being in charge of a motor vehicle and like not paying attention to what is going on around you whilst driving, can prove to be highly dangerous and costly. In the meantime I am going to be pursuing my own affairs, putting stuff in order and starting this New Year with the correct footwear on to get things done and working. I shall also be developing and working upon my website and doing some art promotion. I Think it is too late to do Art Weeks this year, it has alluded me for several years now, so hopefully I manage to get my shit in order for next year and other forthcoming events this year.

My printer has decided to stop working, I think it dislikes the non OEM cartridges I am feeding it, the issue is always with the cyan cartridge, this printer does not like blue for some reason, even when I am printing in black and white. can you believe a printer is so stubborn and crap that it will refuse to print a B&W document or image due to a stoppage in an unrelated area? I have had this machine for almost 10 years now and am giving it one last go with an OEM cartridge and if it denies me the pleasure of making my work space shake and rattle once more then it is going to a new home. I imagine there is a Birkenau ii type place for unruly printers, where they are dismantled and otherwise destroyed and made into something new. I have included a link for anyone who does not know what Birkenau was and trust me there are plenty of them, my former workplace had at least three of them. All they knew about was LGBTQIA+ and other trendy stuff that permeates charitable housing projects staffed by the often idealistic and naive. I would like to mention I have no gripe towards the people I used to work for, actually I did not work for them I just happened to work in their premises. A place that is fit for demolition and where the drains back up into each other, flush the lavvie in room 217 and a phantom turd appears in room 220, you get the general picture.

Sometimes I think this country could do with tidying up and I am not talking about the litter on the streets and people who throw or dump their crap by the side of the road, though that needs addressing as well. The current system is well easy to take the piss out of, claimants receive the rent as opposed to the landlord, that tells you a lot about things. Any benefit you do receive can be spent on almost anything including drugs and alcohol and other non essentials. J tells me in the US or at least NY state you get a payment card that is restricted on what you can purchase and from where, no alcohol, luxury goods and the rest. It is hard core and prevents misuse, in my opinion it is a brilliant idea. I would like to see addicts being given a choice rehab or prison and forcible rehabilitation. Re-education and making things the more unpleasant for non conformers. The benefits system needs to be shaken up. rent payments being made direct to the landlord and robust punishment for those who take the piss. As for putting bloody refugees before our own countries citizens that idea and practice can fuck off immediately. Fill the English channel with man eating sharks, that would deter the fuckers, it’s impractical I know no self respecting man eating shark would want to swim around in that ghastly stretch of water and it would bugger up places like Brighton.

May be a close-up of cat
Lulu Courtesy of Jacklyn Jay

I am going to spend the rest of the day, studying, painting and doing something called eating. I am currently feeling hungry and need to correct this imbalance. In the meantime Lulu the cat has come to remind me she needs fussing and is more important than anything she can think of, which is namely food and sleeping. She likes sitting on the desk up here in the library, where she can be fussed over and stroked to her hearts content, she was brushed this morning and her coat is now softer and glossier than it has been in quite a while. I must clean out the tray later on and replace the litter.

Happy New Year (so far)

Autobiographical

Happy news today, J no longer has the Covid or at least that’s what the test thing said. I have yet to receive feedback from yesterdays excursion perhaps it will be a double celebration. In the meantime I am cooking a curry of some description, needing a change from pasta and with some spare rice going funny it seemed a good idea. The proof of my endeavours will of course be in the eating, the proof is always in the eating of any concoction. The frozen chicken stuff is I am glad to say nearly all gone and after my experiences with meat this last Xmas, I really want to go veggie as soon as. I feel safer eating beans, Tofu and lentils, anyway that’s enough of vegetarianism and the dodgy meat supply. There are better things to write about, have you ever spent inordinate amounts of time looking for an item on the internet or elsewhere and nearly gone mad whilst doing so? I am not doing that, I have asked the universe to provide and am simply letting things work that way, much easier. have you ever used candle magic, to help someone who is sick, as the candle burns, the sickness dissolves. We did that today, it worked but what else did I expect? I asked, it happened. Was the wish based in ego? no, was it based on selfish terms? No. What if it had been, would it have worked, possibly but not in the way expected and probably having a negative impact elsewhere. Always be careful of what and how you ask for things, the universe works in mysterious ways.

More painting, lots more painting and looking for more ideas of things to be painting. Life cannot solely revolve around women in uniform or in their bare skin, well it could I suppose but that might become quite tiresome after a while and the imagination is always asking for the new idea to be put down.. Follow your imagination, your intuition and see where it takes you, if you cannot discern between intuition and your ego, get a book on spirituality and go from there. Or start dabbling with crystals and gem stones, get a book on the subject, eat healthy foods and all that sort of thing. Be kind to animals. I think this is the first day I have not had any covid symptoms, perhaps it was the port wine I drank last night maybe it had an antiseptic effect maybe not. Something appears to have worked, or am I counting my chickens I have no idea.

I had a battle with my printer today, it wanted to do things I had not asked of it. Then it decided it needed blue ink to print a B&W image, the mind boggles and wonders as to the wonders of modern technology especially when there is plenty of Black ink on board the machine to start with. Perhaps its the dodgy cartridges I use, or perhaps its just a dodgy end user, who is better off with a paint brush, than he is with a printer. Which ever way it does not matter so much and what does matter is that I have learnt to discern between what is important and that which is mundane. Still no Covid report, never mind, shall get on and occupy myself in other ways instead

I bought a genuine WW2 German helmet

Autobiographical, politics and religion

So what has happened since I last wrote? Not much to be honest apart from A work colleague lost his rag at me when I told him counting numbers on doors was not my thing. He has difficulty understanding or perhaps appreciating that not everyone is interested in the same stuff as he is, he is full of hot air with no release valve . I on the other hand have several ways of dealing with my varying emotional states and I am happy to say they all work. he also does not like being told that I do not care for anything of what he thinks, especially when it involves myself, he has been told this to his face and he had a tantrum as a result. Otherwise I have a nice bruise from training above my knee and a thumb that does not work (ligaments busted) It made up for dodging the work Xmas party.

As the title suggests I bought a WW2 vintage German (some may say Nazi) steel helmet, Erica the mannequin is kindly modelling it.

Erika the mannequin

The universe has blessed me with a new friend, we have been speaking on and off for the last few months and only recently have we sat down and made proper conversation together. She is nice, interesting, creative and several other things all positive I might add, we may even step out sometime and go eat tea and cake together, visit galleries, museums the universe will guide us I am sure to the places that suit us the best. It would also seem she likes Pink Floyd and that spells good in any language. I may introduce her to the blog sometime, but that will depend on other people in the meantime I shall refer to her as J. This makes it confusing I know as there already is another J involved here, but don’t worry about that Other J is in the US and is doing well, she has had good news of recent though that is also tinged with sadness. Sometimes I would like to wrap my arms around her but my arms just ain’t long enough to do that and I have to do things with words instead. Words are good and can be used in a thousand different ways, speak to my work colleague if you want to know how to speak shit, speak to me if you want to hear about history and why its important that we continue to study the subject, continue unravelling the historical record and not destroying statues that are part of our legacy, bulldozing Auschwitz/ Birkenau will not make it go away, or erase the fact nor will dumping a statue of a slave trader in the harbour.

That BLM shit really gets my goat, black washing everything into non-existence it is left wing socialist creation to further side line and disown the past into nothingness and as a historian I cannot abide or tolerate this in any way, shape or form it is plain wrong. Rather people ought be educated as to what happened and gently reminded slavery has been rife across Africa and the world for that matter since day one, white Europeans just took advantage of a line of business already in existence and whoever engaged in such business was simply a product of the age in which they lived, it does not or did not make them a bad person, much the same as Mark Zuckerburg got the idea to create his product, he saw an opening and made loads of people slaves to his project. Will he be demonised one day? Probably, perhaps he already is.

imagery and news stories of the rock band Pink Floyd
Using a central image of Syd Barret surrounded by the images of the other band members and newsprint stories, providing a pictorial essay of the rock band Pink Floyd from their beginnings up to the present

Painting Nazi’s

Autobiographical, Uncategorized

I am going out to lunch quite soon, but I wanted to write something first. Work is fine, but that I mean I still have employment and have managed to keep my mouth shut when I get the urge to say stuff. School otherwise known as university is good, I am now reading about Russia by way of the Caribbean, Spain and Portugal. I have also just graded to 4th Kyu in my chosen martial art, which means I must work harder than ever and finally my creativity is coming along very well, have plenty to be getting on with and have recently taken up model making again. I am happy

My lunch date went very well, next time we might have to book in advance as we were turned away twice. No big deal really and I must remember to walk more slowly than my usual pace, either that or take smaller strides and perhaps order a salad with my meal and less of the greasy stuff. At least I avoided the cheese from the burger. The cider was pleasant too and served on draught, just as it ought to be.

My collection of offensive t shirts has expanded to include this one above, except mine is in Danish I have started to paint at least a version of this image. Dyanne Thorne is also getting the McFeely treatment I am aware some people may baulk at the Nazi symbolism, see if I care. A painting of panzer ace Michael Wittman is also in the offing, the uniform has been outlined on that one, getting the cap angle right is the big one really, getting the correct shade of black on the uniform is even more so.

THE OLD MAN AND THE SEMEN (with apologies to (Ernest Hemingway)

Autobiographical

We have many colourful and varied people in the wonderful place where I work, some of them if not all of them have I am sure a story or two to tell as to how they wound up in such a drab and uninspiring place. Some of the residents have beards, some do not. Amongst the bearded ones is an old man who has a collection of gentlemen’s interest magazines magazines strewn across his floor. He also has a wide selection of newspaper images which supplement his magazine collection, most of not all of these pictures are stained, the same system is employed in his toilet, again the images he employs have stains all over them. I like to think they are spilt tea, however any half baked fool can tell they are not. The scene is reminiscent of teenage boys bedroom, except these days, those images are more likely to be on a computer and not on the floor. It is my happy task to clean rooms like this and last week it was decided it was to cluttered and messy to move there and we had to speak to management regarding the situation at hand. The magazine owner was naturally upset to hear we wanted to tidy his room and much protest was made as to our throwing his stuff out which had ‘great sentimental value attached to it’ At times like this it is hard not to laugh, so I bit my lip a little instead. Hopefully his room will be more accessible next time but I am not placing any bets on that being the case.

I have not written for a while due to several things, the most recent of which has been a stinking cold, which is finally leaving me, the last traces of it are at least. I just have a troublesome nose to contend with instead. There have been other factors involved too, mostly lack of motivation or doing something else. It would be nice to write more, more often so don’t be surprised if this does not happen and likewise don’t be too surprised if it does. Like model making, school work, painting, reading, gardening and work itself I have to prioritise my work load and it does not follow in that order. Some times I am even compelled to turn my phone off so I do not have to answer it, some people I know can talk for bloody hours about rubbish and I find it boring. The same people also like to complain about things not going their way too. They ought to pee off and find a counsellor dealing in financial anxiety, again that person is not me. J of whom I have written plenty in the past is well and managing her stuff pretty well, she wants to move back to Ithaca NY in some ways I don’t blame her, her current abode sounds a bit tiresome and she yearns for a place she can call home.

What else? I am now the proud owner of a shop mannequin, I am not sure why I bought it but the idea seemed quite novel, it can be sold again quite easily ( I am sure) and plenty of fun can be had with it in the mean time. It would look quite menacing dressed in lingerie with a leather cap and a whip, right now it looks quite harmless in a polka dot blouse, a denim skirt and bobble hat the black tights ensure it does not cold and maintain its modesty. it has yet to be assigned a gender or indeed a name but I suspect something female, seeing it is configured that way with breasts, hips etc. It would be very odd to call it Harold or Arthur, though in this day and age…

I hope to publish something more in the next couple of days

A woman with long dark haired in black leather elbow length gloves and ditto fetish gear kneeling on a bed of straw. she has her hands on her hips in a suggestive and wilful pose
A woman with long dark haired in black leather elbow length gloves and ditto fetish gear kneeling on a bed of straw. she has her hands on her hips in a suggestive and wilful pose

MINGING, GOPPING, HANGING, LEAPING

Autobiographical

My new means of providing sustenance, shelter and material enjoyment is quite taxing, the place is kept warm, too warm. As a result I sweat like a beast in the mating season, I am damp with sweat, sometimes wet from Start to Finish every day. I must stink like nobodies business, the poor people who have to smell me. Twice this this week I have been forced onto public transport, due to either an unwillingness to sit in massive petrol queues, at least twenty cars long each with their mandatory social distancing in force, or the weather which wants to empty itself over me. I hate cycling in the wet, with my need for glasses only compounding that misery. Happily I got a decent sized amount of fuel just this evening, the queue was very small and only in the forecourt itself. Not half way up the bypass and buggering everything up as a result.

I criticised a man at the supermarket on the same journey, he had a several large trays of sickly looking Donuts telling him his rash behaviour would cause a national Donut shortage, people laughed. I have to watch my sense of humour, some people become aggrieved by it, mentioning things like the Spanish Armada or the Battle of Trafalgar to the Spanish. I just deleted a small chunk it did not fit and was irrelevant.

All in all I like my new and sometimes smelly new means of providing for my self, I try not to be too cynical about the people who live there, if not themselves, it is the system that has failed them. I am grateful for the steel toe boots I wear, I would hate to be wearing soft shoes in many of the places I tread. I regard each and every room as a potential health hazard, some of them more than others. Above all my empathy for other people has become more sensitive, yet at the same time more cynical. I like my place of work many many times more than that supermarket shop I worked in a few years ago. They used to put books in the fridges in that place and shit ran down the back wall from the turd lasagne’s in the men’s staff toilets. The toilets where I work are the cleanest in the whole damned city and I bet the county. I love cleaning toilets.

El Lizard Birth and the Equinox

Autobiographical, Uncategorized

I don’t like Historian David Starkey’s style of delivery, but I don’t have to do I? That is one of the joys of having a free mind, being able to make one’s own decisions. David Starkey is without doubt a knowledgeable man on his chosen subject, he also knows how to put his foot in it. In other words, not mincing his words and perhaps speaking before thinking things through, perhaps he has no filter. This having no filter is one of the traits of having ADHD, which is something I would not wish visited on anyone and would not swap for anything, does that make any sense? I have been looking for jobs and new work a fair bit recently and am now working again, happily I am avoiding anything to do with food and shops, I don’t even speak to too many people. Lady Luck has smiled upon me, I have decent hours as well.

In case you are wondering why I mentioned David Starkey, I was listening to his documentary on Elizabeth 1st hence El Lizard Birth and all the rest of it. My job is quite intense and i sweat bucket loads, plus there are plenty of stair cases to negotiate. The nitrile gloves area tit to get on and fill with sweat which splashes everywhere when they are taken off. never mind I am happy to be working, it is worthwhile and for the common good I am glad to serving the greater community. the Fruit Flies are a pain in the arse, they love the smell of home brew (of which I have loads) perhaps if i pout them a blow of the stuff they will drown and save me the fag of spraying them with poison.

I am considering moving my financial interests to another provider, my current people are pretty crap, they close all their high street branches and their website is always broken. They are Cunts, their values are based around Socialist thinking and Socialism begets nothing but ill. Trust me, I have lived in a Socialist country and visited several more. I shall put my money that has branches on the high street, with people you can speak to.

I have been doing more painting and picking up a paint brush is not quite is daunting any more. I hope it continues for a long time, as my studies, and writing. The Home brew wine, in this case, Fig, Rhubarb and Plum is getting on my tits. The noise it is making is unbelievable I wonder what the end product will taste like. I want to bottle up the new Rhubarb wine soon, though to do that a host of bottles will be required. I want to design some labels and pass it off on unsuspecting relatives and friends. I shall drink the rest in due course.

Rhubarb, Plums and the Devils brew

Autobiographical

last night was one of them nights, and a quite familiar experience of recent. How I long for a decent nights sleep again. saying that I do not actually feel as tired as all that, despite having slept for less than 5 hours or at least it seemed like that, certainly not enough. I recall looking at my watch which read 3:30 or something stupid. I swear I had spent most of my time to this point tossing, turning and every other exercise apart from actually sleeping. Perhaps I have too much going on in my head and not being able to find the off switch only exacerbates the whole thing. What else? I went out this morning looking for Mr. Fox. Foxy is my cat who has been missing for an inordinate amount of time, though he has been ‘spotted’ a couple of times, it is now just a matter of either catching him or his coming home. I have to go knock on a door or two in the next couple of days and deal with someone who may be harbouring him, he or a cat like him, has been spotted coming out of there, so who knows. I do not know how I might react if someone has knowingly cat-napped my pet. part of me would want to tear their head off, the other half to do something else.

Another batch of homebrew is getting started, Rhubarb, Plum and Fig this time. First time I have tried the recipe and playing it all by ear. The Rhubarb from earlier in the season is now ready for bottling. The stuff from last year needs filtering again and ought be good for drinking very soon. Then there is the Parsnip and Plum wine to be considered, I think I shall keep the current lot for home consumption and part of any future brew will be passed onto unsuspecting friends and relatives. One imagines, with some simple distilling equipment it can be possible to cook a load of this booze down into a passable liqueur, especially where the Plums are concerned, I am sceptical of the Rhubarb being cooked down into something new though you never know what it might turn out like unless you try.

Job applications, stuff for the Job centre and more exciting stuff have been dealt with, at least in part or in mind. The rest of it shall be completed presently, along with a heap of fiction to make it look like I have done something in accordance with my job seekers agreement, Like spending 40 hours a week looking for work. I think there are better and more profitable things to be doing with my time, though I guess telling that to the employment advisor might be not be such a great idea.

BEASTING

Autobiographical, Uncategorized

My nerves feel at breaking point and my mind is trying to spin me all sorts of strange and sometimes unpleasant ideas. One minute the idea of killing myself pops up, the next how peaceful death would be. Then some fucker comes along and reminds me off the person who finds the corpse, how are they going to feel… I want my cat to come home, I miss him dreadfully and want to hold him in my arms. The rest of it is down to Cyclothymia. I am currently experiencing a downward mood. It’s not fun, but I have to take the rough with the smooth. Happily it makes for something to write about.

I have been wanting to go buy garden shredders and chain saws, a result of doing the garden. I have done loads out side. chopped stuff back, cleared away waste. I have finally planted the vine, in the greenhouse. The flower pots are now in a neat pile at the back, they will be sorted in due course. The Tomatoes look and taste beautiful, far better than the crap in the shops. The bits I want to remove on the Nut Tree have been marked. Chopped up, it will make beautiful fire wood. As will the pile of stuff in the hollow. Something for the equinox perhaps. Blessed be.

I guess I shall be creating a missing notice this afternoon. That and or, going knocking on doors, with a photograph. There is no Karate training tomorrow evening, which means I can spend the day looking for him. Unless of course, he does what he did last time. Appearing as soon, as I start looking for him. So why am I writing this, when I could be out looking. Well TBH I told myself I would do the garden first, then blog and whilst being creative, would make a missing cat sign. All while, thinking about food. I am going to put something on to warm in a couple of minutes., then do the notice. All whilst listening to Roger Waters solo project: ‘The pros and cons of hitch hiking’ This version appears to be missing; 5.06 AM Every strangers eyes.